04 Oct

I am aware I sound like a broken record, but still yet it feels as it still continues to improve, with it’s up and downs. Most difficult days don’t seem to be as difficult. But, after years of meds, pain and uncertainty of the future it is still a struggle. Now that is has been 8 months since the and I am now finding some routine and ideas about what I can do next. At this point I am leaving as much on the table as long as possible, because all to often once it falls off, all too often it’s gone.

I would say the surgery was successful, but I am still cautious about how much better things will get. I have a few ideas different ideas if it continues. As I have my good days I finding plenty to do and keep busy during the day. I continue to research this BIM technology. And, a few other thoughts. Between that I continue to tinker with this vlog concept I seem to have in my mind. At this point if just maybe I can hang on and get past this issue I will move on with my life, but at this point it is still yet to be determined. I know I can do many things with this life, overcoming what I can’t see or describe is what is holding me back and most difficult. I just need that chance? I want that chance? From a far it may not seem that way. But, I have found somethings to hang on too.

As the as the months have past I have had different things to hang on to. Unfortunately, I have had to move the goal post a few times. I was hoping to go to my buddies wedding in June. I am missing out on Noel’s Wedding, that really was a nasty kick to the ______. So, I continue to grind it out and hope this healing will continue. I appreciate I have gone far since my injury, but not any further? Anymore I am just not sure. But, the one thing I have learned is that taking it slow and let things just happen can be ok. I still have my renter. I would like to get back to my place, have a job, be who I was so all those years ago. I don’t defend what happened, but I feel I have paid the price of my accident. That accident took much more than ever thought it would. It seems to have taken a lot from me. both, in time, and in who I am. If things continue improve, finger crossed, I know I can make it back.

That being said I was watching the Amanda Knox Trial in Italy. I hadn’t really paid much attention to the story until as of late, for obvious reasons. And, upon hearing the news I couldn’t be any happier for her. I also feel for the family of Meredith Kercher. Unfortunately, in life justice isn’t imperfect, and perhaps blind for a reason. I hope that her family finds some peace in all the madness.

This morning I was watched a short story about her on ABC news. Her sister talked about how she was going to take her to Lincoln Park. I thought it sounded familar, so I looked it up. I do know that park. when I lived Seattle and began working for Northwest Cable News over a decade ago I would go there from time to time. My apartment at the time was not far from there. I would ride out along the shore and certainly a great place for inspiration. I actually have been drawing myself as of late in a drawing pad. I once used to draw quite often and have found a pleasure in life, that was lost. I would agree with the sis. It is a beautiful park. Like Amanda, but for entirely different circumstances I feel I have changed and need that time to find myself again. I think?

I have done the best I could do. But, I also realizing I could have done so many things different, or better. But, I can’t those years are gone. I guess that is what caught my attention was how how much apparently she has changed since that day. I can empathize with the thought of reclaiming your life. I wish her my best.

With that said I am working on a Yoellin’ Fabrication working around the new television season and other news events as of late. One, being the Boeing 787 Dreamliner. Which, by the way I am adding the the lifelist. Fly on a 787. Wow, those are cool. Ma came back from a sailing trip that took her to Nantucket, and she brought me back a hoodie, thanks ma. The last regular commentary from Andy Rooney. I really don’t have a specific idea, concept, or theme going into one. but, over time it slowly comes together.

So, I leave you with that interview.

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Posted by on October 4, 2011 in Previous Posts


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